If emotion regulation is a challenge for you, you may have been told that you're "too much", have experienced tumultuous relationships, experience a feeling of free-floating pain or suffering, struggle with unwanted (even harmful) behaviors that you use to cope, or feel uncertainty about who you really are.
When our emotions are very big and unwieldy, the world feel like a more dangerous place. In fact, research shows that some people measurably do experience emotions and sensations bigger and more intensely than others. When combined with an invalidating environment, these factors conspire to limit our ability to function well in the world.
Some people with these experiences meet criteria for and personally identify with the term "Borderline Personality Disorder"- and some do not. That definition is not essential to me, and actually carries a lot of challenging stigma, history, and debate.
What is more important is that if you identify in any way with this description, it IS possible to name, experience, and manage those emotions with self-compassion, and to live a life that feels meaningful and values-aligned. I have been honored to be a support for dozens of badass people making that journey, and I would be honored to do it with you.
In therapy with me, you'll experience a blend of strategies from Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) to help you build skills for managing intense emotions and impulsivity.
We'll identify your values and work to find pathways to self-compassion. We'll focus on understanding your emotional cues, learn how to "surf" the wave of difficult feelings without acting on them, and find ways to connect with your values to make decisions that align with your true self.
By practicing tools from mindfulness, distress tolerance, and emotional regulation, you'll learn to exist alongside your emotions more tolerably. We will also incorporate interpersonal effectiveness skills, particularly if you find that relationships are a place where your emotions tend to take the wheel.
The goal is to create a life where you're not just reacting to what's happening around you, but instead choosing to respond in a way that feels more grounded and true to who you are. Those problem behaviors also become less compelling and easier to resist when we are managing our emotions and accepting ourselves, warts and all.
Through this process, clients report discovering a stronger sense of self and a greater ability to advocate for their own needs without compromising relationships.